ChristianForums: Interactions with ~~Elsewhere~~

2006-11-11 18:41

Many years ago, one of the CF regulars, who had gotten the feeling he wasn’t very welcome, started a thread over on Internet Infidels, called “CF Outcasts”. This thread grew, and more threads followed. Originally they were in the “Miscellaneous Discussions” forum, but when a forum reorganization moved that into the “no-preaching” part of the site, the threads were moved into IIDB’s catch-all “~~Elsewhere~~” forum.

There have been a lot of these. IIDB staff started merging them together, then splitting them every so often; every 1000-2000 posts, perhaps. The current chain is up to Continuation LI, and that’s roman numerals.

These threads are often the subject of a great deal of consternation at CF, as various material from CF will tend to get reposted and talked about. Many staff believe that the participants in the IIDB/CF threads are in an organized plot against ChristianForums, Christianity, or who knows what else. This belief is frankly just stupid. Various attempts abound to make a big deal about how many of the posters there have an “agenda”. The word “agenda” is used to denote what happens when someone you don’t like wants to do something; it’s distinct from “taking a stand” in that it’s not one you agree with.

One of the interesting side-effects of these threads is that, since IIDB does not have all the rules squelching discussion that CF does, sometimes people at IIDB are able to actually work things out.

Let’s have an example. One of the most infamous conservative members of CF went by the username “sweetkitty”. Under CF’s restrictive homosexuality rules, her own position (that gay sex is a sin) was problematic, moreso because she is an ex-lesbian, who believes that God delivered her from this. As you might guess, she has been in a fair amount of conflict with some of the “liberals”. CF’s very restrictive rules were problematic; for instance, under the “you must have citations and evidence” rule, she was prohibited from sharing her own testimony and experiences.

I remember for a long time believing her to be a really nasty person, because of the filters imposed by the CF rules. One day, though, I made some comment about people trying to keep other people out of Heaven, and she said that there is no one who is opposed to seeing other people go to Heaven. I pointed her at a thread I’d seen where someone argued for a position based on the belief that, if it were not true, there would be murderers in Heaven, and that would be horrible. Her response was that this was so upsetting she had to go bake some cookies.

It may sound trivial, but I think I understand. Sometimes human evil is so overwhelming that there’s simply no way to confront it head-on, and all you can do is go make something, as a sort of fundamental affirmation of creation itself.

Sweetkitty changed her username later to kdet. A number of people (myself included) originally assumed she did this to get away from her fairly impressive bad reputation, but she denied this, and I think in retrospect it was just uncharitable bitching to think so.

Anyway, one of the people kdet got along with least was UberLutheran, who is an older gay man. He’s a very committed liberal, active in politics, and deeply concerned about a lot of liberal issues. You can see how they’d end up in conflict. They fought. A lot. And, in fact, CF staff ordered them to not communicate, at all, with each other on CF. No private messages, no responses to posts, nothing. So that just festered.

Because people griped about her in the IIDB threads, kdet showed up. What followed was a conversation I will just reproduce here:

kdet: Well, we can only hope. [about the possibility of UL leaving CF]
elanor: So out of curiosity, are you content with feeling that way about a brother in Christ? I know sometimes I get fed up and think my world would be easier without someone around, but I’m always upset with myself for that attitude and have to take it to the Lord to ask for a change of heart.
kdet: Ok, you are right. I shouldn’t want him to leave or rejoice if he does leave. I’m reading The Bait of Satan by John Bevere, I haven’t gotten very far in the book yet but it has addressed not rejoicing in situations like these. I’m sorry Uber and I aplogize to the rest of you for speaking like I did. No excuses, I just screwed up. I tend to let people get under my skin and then lash out. Something I need to work on alot. Sorry

elanor:
I’m in the same boat with you, kdet. I’m still waiting for the day when I get to the end of it and don’t have to say, ‘I screwed up again, Lord.’ Thank you for apologizing. That’s a very hard thing for me to do—stubborn pride being what it is—so this is a witness to me.

Hey, I get to WA sometimes. If you ever want to say howdy and sit down for a coffee (or Diet Coke—my version of coffee ), just holler.

kdet: Thanks for your patience and thanks for making me think

UberLutheran:
kdet knows she’s prohibited from responding to any post I make on CF.
Which is why she can come over to the heathen board on IIDF and spew.

Isn’t that right, kdet? I believe The Colonel prohibited us from having any contact with each other on CF — but now you’ve come over here to witness to the Democrats and the liberals and those awful homosexuals (who certainly aren’t like you, are they, hon?) and you can say whatever you like without fear of recrimination.

Would you like to have this out once and for all, kdet? Right on this board? Because I’m not the least bit afraid of taking my verbal scapal and doing a dissection of you, right in front of everybody — if that’s what you really want.

Your choice. :)

kdet: I guess you missed my apology to you. So here it is again. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said what I said. I have a hard time dealing with people I don’t like, something that I am really trying to work on and sometimes I really fall flat on my face. I realize every day how ‘m not as good of a person as I want to be nor as good of a Christian as I hope to be. But I am trying, and I do hope to grow and change every day and to become a better person and Christian. So again I apologize and please try and remember I am like everyone else, not horrible and not perfect, just a work in progress.

UberLutheran:
Hon, if I had a nickel for every time I’d screwed up…

I would have enough money to take both us to Europe for four weeks, stay in four-star hotels, and eat haute cuisine every single meal.

Though I would probably recommend that we stay in separate rooms, lest you and I kill each other during the trip. :D

Actually, you posted a couple of things very recently over in Liberal Theology which I agreed with. Obviously, I can’t rep you without violating the terms of the agreement set in place by The Colonel; but I thought your comments were right on the mark.

What happened between us is called life; and the fact that both of us are Christian — staunchly Christian, even — doesn’t mean we’re necessarily going to agree or that we even need to agree. Which is OK. I really believe Christ has a big enough tent to be able to accommodate differences in belief.

kdet: Thanks for being so understanding :) I do have to disagree with you about one thing though, I really don’t believe that we would not get along in real life. There is so much about you that is fascinating.

UberLutheran:
:bugeyes: You’re kidding??!!
Not to sound vain, but what about me do you find fascinating?

I’m not “begging compliments”, but nobody has EVER said that to me before!

kdet:
You must be kidding! How about this for a few reasons?

storm chasing, classical music, cats, cooking

You are incredibly intelligent and articulate and have a delicious sense of humor.
Of course there is more, but I think that should hold you for now.

All things that I LOVE

I have two cats, use to have 30 show cats untill they contacted feline luekima that I brought home from a Siamese I had bought from a pet store.

I love to cook, it is my passion. I just found a new dinner roll recipe online that I was so excited over you’d think I’d discovered gold

I love music and I love storms.

And that’s that. Reconciliation, because they were allowed to say things, and then, having said them, go further and say other things, that might not have been what came to mind first, but which mattered.

There’s been a lot of reconciliation that has happened off in the dim and dusty corners of IIDB.

Peter Seebach

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Comments

  1. strange, for someone who speaks about outcast at CF, when I tried to register at IIDB, I never got to go in as I do at CF.. Never got to post :(

    got this message:
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    Thank you for registering, *****. Your account has been submitted for moderation by an administrator and will be activated shortly. You will be notified by email when this happens. To return to the forums, click here.
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    Waited 1 week to post at IIDB, think this is very strange and very like maybe the admins have to check me out before I can post there. Who seems to witch hunt there?

    No thanks.. trash my registration please.

    — Eric · 2006-11-11 20:08 · #

  2. BWAP and I reconcilled via IIDB posts.

    — buzz · 2006-11-11 21:39 · #

  3. Eric--

    Strange.

    If you give me the name you tried to register with, I can see what is up with it.

    — rigorist · 2006-11-12 00:12 · #

 
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